I can really relate to this. It’s not always easy to align what we believe with what we do. We are human, we slip, we make mistakes. It happens ALL the time and that’s okay. We pick ourselves up, we learn and we do better tomorrow.
I admit, I am guilty of being irrationally hard on myself for simple little mistakes and sometimes for the quirks that make me, me.
I look at all of these posts on social media and see beautiful people, fit people, rich people, happy people and sometimes, I compare myself.
“Why don’t I look like her?”
“I wish I were as successful as she is.”
“I wish I could do that!”
I would never tell a friend to compare them self to anyone else. So why is it okay when I do it myself? I am reminded not to compare my ‘behind the scenes’ to their ‘highlight reel.’
I am working towards becoming the person that I want to be and that takes time and patience (not yet a virtue of mine). I see a therapist because mental health is just as important as physical health. I honestly believe that everyone could benefit from some time in therapy.
Why are we so afraid of that word? Let’s eradicate the stigma because in this world of social media and false representation, too many of us fall into this trap of comparing. We are creating a culture of constant insecurity and implied inadequacy.
You are wonderful. My pictures, his pictures, her pictures…they don’t matter. You don’t know what led to those photos.
Be careful of what it is that you envy. Take the time to discover who you are and grow into the best version of yourself.
I will be doing the same.
It has been too long since I have taken the time to sit down and write. For that, I humbly apologize. I would like to convince myself that I had good reason to take the time off but perhaps that is just an excuse to pardon my being remiss.
My return to the blogosphere may not be the most entertaining blog that I have yet to produce but it is very important. I have decided to begin a new venture and with that, I will be needing the support of all of you. I am a master procrastinator and while I prefer to look at this as something of a talent, I will need the encouragement from friends and family to suppress this talent and get to work. Are you ready to help keep me happy, motivated, and positive?!?! ARE YOU WITH ME?!?!?! I can’t hear you!!!!!!!
Or see you for that matter, so I’m just going to pretend that you all said yes. Good, now that we’ve cleared that up I can tell you what this venture of mine will be! Let me first start off by saying that I am well aware that I have said many a time that I want to do this and I want to do that, and I never seem to get around to it. This isn’t like that. I often tell myself that I am going to do something in the hopes that hearing the words aloud will inspire me. Often, I am very, very wrong. When I feel something within me screaming that something needs to be done, well…now shit’s serious. It is a little hard to explain and maybe some of you don’t believe in intuition or “feelings” but I do. My soul is telling me that it is time to quit putzing around and get working.
A movie. This is my new venture. I would like to create and produce a feature-length movie from start to finish. I am taking it very seriously this time. The idea is becoming more and more real to me with every breath I take. I have invested in numerous screenwriting books as I attempt to teach myself a method that will work for me as I plan to write my very own feature. Yes, sometimes it is difficult to keep the faith , but for this new project, keeping the faith is my only option. If I can feel it deep within me, I have no choice but to believe that this is what I am meant to do.
A few of my good friends know that I harbor aspirations of becoming the next Tina Fey or Woody Allen. For those of you who don’t understand, this means that I would love to write my own works, hopefully quirky like Tina Fey, and then shove myself in a leading role, a la Woody Allen. As for this film, I have made no casting decisions as of yet. I plan to write a character driven movie and once those characters become more clear, I will begin to think about casting choices. As for a crew, I do have a few people in mind that I would love to work with but again, I am thinking too far ahead. (But everyone keep your fingers crossed that I will get to work with my idols!)
This is more than a labor of love for me. I’ve been going through a bit of a difficult time and I remember being so happy when I made my first movie (It’s posted in my first blog…check it out if you’re looking for a good giggle.) It’s not that I want to make this movie; it’s that I need to. I make no secret of the fact that I am unhappy with the way my first movie panned out. I loved the people I worked with more than anything and I would never want to cast doubt on their abilities. Everyone involved did a fantastic job and the movie is still quite enjoyable. The only problem was that it wasn’t what I had envisioned. This time around, I will be taking more care to ensure that my vision is what you see on that screen.
I will continue to blog about nonsense with a few posts about my progress along the way. I hope to keep you entertained and just as excited as I am for this new step in my life.
So Support Team… let’s get crackin’!